Ever have those moments ? WhenYour laptop won’t work, or the car won’t start, or the childminder is sick, or we just feel fed up with things that are totally beyond our control. Something happens, and it triggers us to be overwhelmed and frustrated and want to throw your laptop or your handbag out the window (okay, maybe not your prized Mulberry, but you’ve come close). 

I wanted to call this article, how to thrive when you’re efffed-off, but I thought it might scare some of you away! But you get the sentiment. 

 

Sometimes we can’t control what happens, but we can control our reaction to it. Before you reach for the tub of ice-cream, or want to EXPLODE WITH RAGE – take a deep breath. Breathe in for a count of four… 1, 2, 3, 4, pause and hold the breath, and then breathe out 1, 2, 3, 4. Repeat this for a couple of minutes, and until you feel calmer. 

 

Now you’re thinking more clearly, and using your logical cortex brain rather than your “cave-woman” limbic brain you’ll make better decisions. 

 

[emaillocker]Now ask yourself what 3 actions can you take to find a way out of this situation? Who can you call or email to help you? What can you do to put it right? 

 

Taking action makes you feel better, and you might even solve the issue pretty quickly now that you’re calm and in control. 

 

If it’s still not working, think about what you can do instead…. Even if that means listening to an audio book while you wait for someone to fix your broken down car, or journaling. That way, if you stay calm, you can come away from the experience having learned something and having gained something – rather than just moaning about it on Facebook and to your colleagues. 

 

How can you learn from this “failure” and use it as a springboard to leap forward professionally and personally? Sometimes failing at an exam or the oven breaking can be the momentum we need to change the way that we cook or study or think… 

 

When the dust has settled, ask yourself what could you have done differently? What steps can you take now to ensure it doesn’t happen again? You may not be able to control the situation, but you can control your response to the situation… how could you handle you response better and more effectively in the future?

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